http://blog.damianandjenn.com/ en-us Nucleus CMS v3.41 © Weblog http://backend.userland.com/rss http://blog.damianandjenn.com//nucleus/nucleus2.gif http://blog.damianandjenn.com/ http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=599
Since my last post, we've had Christmas, and New Year's, and birthday parties for both boys. As you might imagine, Christmas was magical - the wide-eyed wonder both boys showed is what I live for. Mason was truly concerned about Santa coming down the chimney and how we would negotiate the tight space while not catching on fire. He said, with concern in his eyes, "Santa come down chimney! Burn butt!"

How did I handle this, you ask? I didn't. Disney did it for me. Thank you Disney! They made a show called Prep & Landing, all about the elves who visit your house and get it ready for Santa's arrival, using (among other things) a fire extinguisher to put out the fire and prevent any butt burning incidents.

2010 arrived with a bottle of champagne, and then it was right off to Mason's birthday party. Dave, Jen and Peyton were in town, so they were able to join us, and that was truly awesome. I barked orders at them like a drill sergeant all morning, and they took it like champs and helped us have a successful party for our resident 3-year-old.

And then the miracle child turned 5. What a day that was. It's so hard to fathom that there was a time when we thought he'd never reach his first birthday. And now here he is - whooping my butt in Monopoly Jr. on a daily basis and generally making me feel like a proud mama and an idiot at the same time. I guess that's what kids are for, right? We invited Corey's entire preschool class for his party, because as I said earlier, I'm an idiot. By some miracle it turned out to be a great party, though, and Corey was thrilled to have all his friends with him. Additionally miraculous was the fact that I didn't fall on my face during the party, because for some reason I decided that it would be a good idea to wear my stilettos with my bluejeans, which, as everyone knows, is the most practical thing to wear for a kid's birthday party. Or wait, maybe that was for Mason's party? I forget. It's that idiot thing again.

As I said, we are also potty training. Or should I say, we are in potty training hell. I have successfully trained Mason to use the laptop - he can navigate Nick Jr. on his own, play games, and surf around on youtube, but for some reason the act of pulling down his pants and sitting on the toilet is just beyond his ability. He finally decided to start talking, however, so now he can tell me all about it in fabulous detail when he poops in his pants or pees on the floor. (sigh)

I guess the only other noteworthy item at the moment is that Corey absolutely loves school. When we got 28 inches of snow (or whatever it was - it was a ridiculous amount), Corey cried because his school was closed. One day I said to him, in an effort to stop him from crying, "Corey, do you want to get a doughnut?" He yelled at the top of his lungs, "I DON'T WANNA GET A DOUGHNUT! I JUST WANNA GO TO SCHOOL!" Then he wailed even louder.

I'm going to miss these days. Time to walk to the docks and throw rocks in the water. ]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=599 Sun, 7 Mar 2010 14:46:15 -0500 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=598
The boys also had an excellent time yesterday. All day long Mason said over and over "Go Aunt Vicki's! Go Aunt Vicki's! Go Aunt Vicki's NOW!" That's his favorite new word - "now". I'd rank that word right up there with "no" and "why" on the list of most annoying words uttered by a toddler. Anyway, both boys were super excited to see the dogs, see the koi pond ("Waterfall on!"), and ride the scooters at Aunt Vicki's house. Damian and I were excited to have some adult conversation and spend time with family.

We also had the joy of meeting Phoebe, Bruce & Vicki's granddaughter, for the first time. Or should I say, "Big Daddy" and "Big Mama". The curly red-head is a charmer, and she had everybody in the room wrapped around her little finger. Corey made fast friends with Jack, Phoebe's brother, and I wished that they lived closer so the boys could get together more often. All the kids were really good, and it helped make the evening a pleasant one indeed.

This morning, after dousing my liver with some water and a cup of strong coffee, the boys, their Gaga, and I decided to brave the malls on Black Friday. I know - what were we thinking? Actually the problem was that I still had cobwebs in my brain from last night's festivities, or I'd never have considered it. The drive over was relatively uneventful, but parking the van was like parking the van at the mall on Black Friday. There's no better or more accurate analogy to be made. This is a duh situation, and really, cobwebs or not, how did I not see that coming? Mom and I were chatting on the way over, trying to justify our idiocy by making ridiculous statements like, "Well, the morning shoppers are probably gone by this time, and the afternoon shoppers haven't started yet, so maybe it'll be fine." Yeah. See? I told you. Idiocy.

When we finally parked the van (across the street from the mall at Marshall's - we really needed Big Daddy's lucky parking skills), we hoofed it inside and found that it was bustling, but not horrible. Perhaps before lunch is the time to go, as people aren't yet haggard from an entire day of elbowing fellow shoppers out of the way. Or maybe everybody in the mall was just so happy to have parked their cars that their spirits were high. But whatever the reason, it was fine.

We did our normal mall routine, and the boys had a great time. In fact, the only thing that really annoyed me was the people who kept jumping out at me from those stalls in the aisles of the mall, waving stuff in my face and shouting, "Free sample ma'am?" Gah! I don't want it! And if I do want it, I'm sure I can find it myself! I got so irritated that I briefly considered taking the free sample and tossing it in the trash in front of the salesperson. Luckily good sense prevailed and I did not, however, because I'm sure I would later have felt guilty. As it was, I escaped the mall with both my children and a guilt-free conscience. Now if I can just do that from now until after the holidays.

After that it's a new year, and I figure all bets are off.


]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=598 Fri, 27 Nov 2009 14:56:08 -0500 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=597
But let's get back to this particular night of meaningless fluff. The DJ was prattling on and then said, "Families argue for a total of 4 days per year." Add together all the time a family spends arguing, and it equals 4 days. My head whipped around, my jaw hit the floor, and I said out loud (to the radio), "What?! There is no way families argue for 4 days!" I might have bought 40 days, perhaps even 400, if a year didn't stop at 365. Not 4. Even though it's not as though this estimate is based on any factual/reliable study, I still felt my blood start to boil.

You see, my job is not stay-at-home mom, it's Professional Arguer. I spend all day, every day, arguing with my unreasonable spawn.

"Mommy, I want a piece of candy from my Halloween pumpkin."
"No."
"But WHY?"
"Uh, because you haven't pooped on the potty, eaten your whole dinner, or any of the other things you need to do to earn a piece of candy."
"But...."
"No...."

And on and on and on. This could continue for 30 minutes or more. It's like a tennis match. Corey lobs some BS over the net, and I lob it back. He lobs again, and I lob back. Back and forth, back and forth, potentially ending in a Serena Williams-esque meltdown at the end.

And let's not forget the 2-year-old, who may lack vocabulary, but is still quite capable of promoting his agenda with impressive levels of stamina.

Considering all of this, I started trying to come up with a more accurate estimate of the amount of time spend arguing. I quickly gave up on this in favor of jealousy of these families who only argue for a total of 4 days in a year.

I quickly forgot about my jealousy, however, when one of my children asked me for something else that I was unable to provide right that moment. That's the one upside to the constant arguing - there's little room for contemplation, as my attention is constantly being diverted away from whatever I was trying to focus on. Call me on the phone if you want a demonstration. Make sure you have a pen handy so you can note the number of times I ask you to repeat what you've just said. ]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=597 Sat, 21 Nov 2009 18:17:17 -0500 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=595
1) A 2-year-old, much like a dog, will continue to eat candy until the candy runs out, at which point he will search out the candy of his unsuspecting brother and cousin. Both pilfering and puking could happen without adult intervention.

2) Candy does not stop a full fledged 4-year-old tantrum if the 4-year-old is exhausted and the tantrum is in full swing.

3) Teenagers will dump your entire bowl of offering candy in their bag if you leave it unattended, even though you have a sign that CLEARLY states "Please take one piece".

4) People in our neighborhood were creative enough with their decorations to win contests and draw paparazzi. Our decorations, in comparison, were totally lame. We had a couple of jack-o-lanterns and some ghosts in the trees, whereas we saw an entire yard that looked exactly like the set of "Where the Wild Things Are", complete with Max in his boat. If my jaw had hung open any longer, flies would have settled in.

5) If you ask your husband to tend the grill, you must give him time to do so, otherwise the burgers will strongly resemble hockey pucks. (Perhaps I should have saved some to throw at those teenagers.)

In all seriousness, everyone had a wonderful time this Halloween. The boys were pirates (which caused random passerby to shout "ARRGGH!" every so often, and which also caused people to ask, "Are they twins?"), and Sydney joined them as the lovely Princess Aurora. Even Baby Evan came along in the Bjorn. The boys participated in a parade around the neighborhood, which I found impressive, given the distance they marched without getting any candy. Mason wore a deep frown by the end, and I had to wonder if he was thinking "Where is all this candy I was promised! This is lame! They're making me march around here in the rain in this stupid puffy shirt with no sustenance!"

But we did in fact trick-or-treat once the sun dropped, and the best part for me was watching the kids flit from house to house, eyes lit with excitement, grinning ear-to-ear. We saw some impressive costumes along the way, including Snow White, a whoopie cushion, the tiniest Santa Claus I've ever seen, and a baby in a hot dog bun, nestled in a hot dog cart (complete with condiments), snoozing away. When we finally finished, we came home and gathered for a meal together before tucking our exhausted kids in for the night. Good memories. Happy Halloween.
]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=595 Sun, 1 Nov 2009 16:59:32 -0500 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=594
And now on to fun Mason sayings. The little man is starting to talk much more, and he's come up with some pretty funny quotes. Here is a list of them that I've been compiling.

When passing garages, Mason inspects the doors and announces whether they are open or shut, or half open or shut, or any other version of open/shut. I like it when it's a 2-car garage and one door is open, the other shut, and he says, "One door shut door! One door opa door!" Department of Redundancy Department.

One morning I winked at Mason, and he said, "One eye opa door, one eye shut door!"

For anything chocolate, Mason uses the word "black". As in "Black donut!" or "Black milk!" etc.

"Wood Dot!" = "Woodstock" from Snoopy.

During a phone conversation - "Are you having a good time with Nanny and Papa?" Mason, "Yeah! Good time!"

When passing gas in the bath tub, "Boop!"

In the parking lot at Giant, a guy started backing up as we were passing, and I said, "Don't back up, Buddy!" Mason yelled, "Yeah! Buddy! No back up!" He's got my back.

We had a playdate with Sydney and Evan, and Mason trotted around the house before we left chanting "Sydney Sydney Sydney!" Somebody likes his cousin.

"SHREK ON YOUTUBE!"
I sat Mason on the potty, and finally I asked him, "Are you going to pee pee, or what?" He looked at me and announced, "WHAT!" Indeed.
Last night when I put Mason to bed, I said, "I love you Mason", and, totally unprompted, he replied, "Mama, Mason love MOMMY!" Then he gave me a big grin and a huge hug. So sweet.

And I'll leave you with one Corey quote:
"I don't want to get a donut! I JUST WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL!" I met this 4-year-old announcement with stunned silence.
Happy Halloween! I'll post about our two pirates trick-or-treating experience some time after the fun ends......]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=594 Thu, 29 Oct 2009 16:38:40 -0500 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=593
There were two issues of concern. First, Corey's heart rhythm on EKG is abnormal. Apparently this is not anything to get my knickers in a knot over, however. It happens with post-Fontan kids, according to Dr. Brenner, and we should not be particularly concerned. Still, there's nothing quite like hearing, "Your child's sinus rhythm is not normal" to get my own heart rate up.

The second issue is that Corey's liver is enlarged. Dr. Brenner examined Corey, and he didn't intend to do an echocardiogram today, but when he found the enlarged liver, he changed his mind. I thought perhaps the liver enlargement was due to Corey's Warfarin therapy (he's been taking a large dose, as the lower doses were ineffective), but Dr. Brenner reassured me that this is not the case.

And so, the main concern was actually the pressure in Corey's right atrium. If the pressure is too high, it puts too high a load on the left ventricle, and since as we all know Corey only has one ventricle, we need to protect it. This would mean possibly giving another med (Enalapril) to decrease the load.

So we had one seriously extensive echocardiogram. We're talking three Dora episodes. In the end, Dr. Brenner was satisfied that the pressures in Corey's right atrium weren't too high, the load on his left ventricle is not too much, the function of said ventricle is very good, and Corey is fine, sans Enalapril. Phew! My knees were a little rubbery at this point.

After all that fun, Corey had a finger stick to check his INR. His Warfarin therapy has been tricky. The goal range is 2.0 - 2.5, but Corey was as low as 1.1, to 1.2, to 1.3, then to 1.9 at last check. (When the numbers are too low, he is at risk for stroke.) We were surprised and happy to see him hit 2.5 today, which also means we don't need to have another blood draw for three weeks. Good news!

On the way out the door, we bought some gummy worms (and coffee for mommy) and headed home. We'll go to the mall this afternoon and shoot for some normalcy, but I must say, I was impressed with how well my little man handled himself. The echo tech told us that some kids kick and scream the whole way through the echo, because they are tired of people poking at them. Corey is in the other camp - he just hangs out and watches the show, and tries to talk the tech's ear off. That's my sweet little tough guy. ]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=593 Fri, 21 Aug 2009 14:13:23 -0400 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=592
Corey was game for keeping me company and joining me on the ice, even though, at age 4, he's never had skates on his feet before. Mostly I think he was interested in seeing his mommy fall on her butt, though he did really well on the ice. After the skating, there was a time for people to share refreshments and stories about Marty. I managed to stay for all of about 5 minutes of that part before a 4-year-old tantrum threatened the peace of the gathering. So while I'm glad that I got to go, and I'm not sorry that I took Corey, I still have a few things to say about Marty.

First of all, when it came to living life, Marty didn't mess around. He was a technical whiz, but also a musician, and he played hockey with fervor as well. And then he got sick. Young. But I never knew him to indulge in a moment's self pity, and he was always in a good mood. He was absolutely the most positive person I've met in my life. And I lost touch with him a couple of years ago. Which, as only death can, leaves me with regret and reminds me to follow the cliches and appreciate those I love. I'm not going to do any "live like it's your last day!" preaching - that's too stressful. But I will try to take a page from Marty's book and live more like he did.

And now I have a story to share about one major way Marty impacted my life. One of our band members suggested Marty try internet dating. Marty said, "Bah!" But then he changed his mind and decided he would try it, only he was going to type in the search criteria for his perfect woman. We're talking everything - from level of education right down to her eye color. He figured there would be no such lady with such specific criteria. But he was wrong - there was one. Darcy.

After his success, he helped me try it as well. I thought it would be fun - I'd date a bit, meet some new people, and have a good time. Marty helped me upload some pictures and came up with a screen name for me. And I did meet some people, including my husband. So I, and my children I'm sure, are thankful that Marty helped us find our way to one another. If he hadn't helped me when he did, this family wouldn't exist. That's no small thing, and I don't forget it.

At the memorial service Marty's ice hockey gear was on display. Corey was fascinated. The skates had dirt and blood on them, and Corey astutely observed, "He skated a lot - his skates are really dirty." I told him why we were there, but I don't think it sunk in. He's 4 - how could it really? But that night he gave me pause as I tucked him in to sleep. He said, "Mommy, did you get to say goodbye to the person with the dirty skates?" I sighed and said, "Mostly yes, Honey." But not totally. So I'm going to do it now.

Goodbye Marty. When I heard that you had passed away, I sobbed like a big baby. But now I'm going to remember you with a grin, because I know you'd like it that way. I'm going to remember you next to me on the stage murdering the keyboard, and I'm going to remember you the last time I saw you - roller-blading with Darcy on the B&A trail, happy. No more tears, I promise, but I can't promise I won't miss you, because I will, and I do.]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=592 Sun, 16 Aug 2009 14:10:37 -0400 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=591
The painters are there now, and the new carpet will be installed next Thursday. I can't wait to get in there and clean, unpack, and set up the furniture. We took the boys over yesterday, along with a van full of stuff, and they had a great time getting in the way of the painters. When we got to the house, the boys immediately started running around like maniacs.

Then Corey discovered the laundry shoot. Oh, the joy of the laundry shoot. He made it his mission to send anything he could find down the laundry shoot. Oh yes. In fact, he managed to drop a card right on Joe's (the painter's) head, as he unluckily was standing right under the shoot beside the mud sink when Corey dropped it. Oh yes. But Joe and his boys took pity on us and unloaded the van. Wasn't that nice? Actually, they probably just wanted me to get my urchin children the hell out of there.

There is playground equipment in the back and a nice backyard for the boys to run around in. There is tons of room downstairs to run around, and there are toys in Corey's closet. But none of this compares with the laundry shoot. Corey said, "Mommy, when we are here, I might sneak into your room in the middle of the night and put stuff down the chute!" Oh, lucky me.

And speaking of, when we're all moved in and settled/organized (which could take some time with the short people under foot), we'll have a housewarming party, and you can all come over and play with us!

And I'll leave you with one more funny Corey quote. On the drive over, it was raining a bit, and the windshield wipers were on. Corey said, "Mommy, why are they called windy wipers if they don't wipe wind?" I'd say.]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=591 Fri, 24 Jul 2009 13:26:39 -0400 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=590
He also loves it when I sing any song from the movie. I've learned to use this as a tool to get what I want. As in, "Mason, if you brush your teeth, I'll sing an Ariel song." Works like a charm! Unfortunately, on the other side of the coin, I never know when he's going to request an Ariel tune. Or who I'll be with. And if he wants it, he wants it, and he is not above shrieking like a banshee to get it. When he reaches decibel levels that make the neighborhood dogs howl, I'll pretty much do anything to make it stop. Which means, you guessed it! I may be singing in the cereal aisle at Giant.

As a mortifying example, the other night we were picking crabs with the family, and Mason decided he wasn't going to stop behaving like a maniac unless I sang. So I did. In front of everybody. With a crab mallet in one hand. I'm nothing if not classy and sophisticated.

Corey is uninterested in my singing, thankfully. He's all about Cornholio these days, however, and if I give him my (really sad and pathetic) Beavis and Butthead imitation, I can get him to do things like brush his teeth as well. Or if I let him pee in the bushes. That's a great motivator too.

Maybe I should have titled this post "Cheap and Easy Ways to Motivate Little Boys".

The other morning the boys were in rare form. I took them shopping (spending the last of my rapidly dwindling "discretionary fund") at Bed Bath & Beyond. I picked up some new bedding and some new bath items so that we can decorate our new master bedroom/master bath.

Well, I learned quickly that BB&B isn't the most kid friendly shop in town. The boys got restless (after all of 2 minutes) and started reaching their arms out of the cart to grab items from the shelves. They managed to throw several things on the floor before I could stop them, giggling like banshees all the while. It was mortifying.

But that wasn't the worst of it. There is a lollipop tree at the check-out counter. What Einstein decided to put a lollipop tree at the check-out counter? Yes, perhaps they will sell more lollipops, but given that they are $1 in a shop of things that are often several hundred dollars, doesn't it make more sense not to tick off the moms coming through the shop by putting a $!#%^W^$$TAA-ing lollipop tree at the CHECK-OUT COUNTER!

So the boys were whining for lollipops, which I in no way intended to give them, as they'd been urchins all through the shop. And we were waiting to check out, and the whining increased. Waiting and whining. Whining and waiting. And on and on and on. Then, when we'd checked out, and I finally thought we were going to head out and be done with the whole mess, Corey reached out, grabbed a lollipop, and knocked the entire tree onto the floor! OH MY GOD! I thought my head would explode! If it was actually possible to die of embarrassment, we'd be announcing my funeral.

On the way back to the car, Corey said, "Mommy, don't you want to sell us on Ebay?" ]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=590 Wed, 24 Jun 2009 06:46:53 -0400 http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=589
OK, so we don't love the electric blue carpet. But! We got $20K less than the list price, and a $5K carpet allowance, however, so we'll spend that $5K on carpet before we ever move in. The house is wonderful - the space and light are amazing, the kitchen has granite countertops, there is so much openness to it. Plus it has a huge fenced backyard with playground equipment. There are four bedrooms upstairs, and the basement is partially finished. And it has a wood-burning fireplace! And water priveleges, since it's so close to the Bay.

And OK, we don't love the ducks. But they are everywhere. There's even a duck stained-glass window. I looked at that thing and thought, "Can I live with that duck window? How much will it cost me to replace it? And what if they take that great playground equipment?" You can imagine how thrilled we were to discover that the duck stained glass window is in the exclusions. They're taking the duck! And leaving the playground equipment! Wa hoo! We briefly considered stipulating that their porcelain bulldog had to remain in the house before we'd agree to buy it, but then we thought better of acting like punks.

Time for a new chapter of our lives.
]]> General http://blog.damianandjenn.com/index.php?itemid=589 Sun, 21 Jun 2009 14:07:25 -0400