Happy 1st Birthday to Corey!

Last February 22, I woke up at 4:30 AM to take yet another trip to the loo, and my water broke. I ran back into the bedroom and shook Damian awake. "My water broke!" I yelled. "What?! What?!" Damian yelled back. He couldn't hear me, because he'd been sleeping with earplugs. I was so big that I snored like a freight train for the last few weeks of my pregnancy. Once he got the earplugs out and realized what I was saying, he was out of the house like a shot. We hit the road for Hopkins - no traffic, since it was so early. Damian likes to joke that it was the perfect time for me to go into labor.

Corey was born at around 8:30 that night. 7 pounds, 13 ounces. He was pink and cute! Nobody could have guessed he had a major congenital heart defect. The anesthesiologist who performed my C-section even said, "That's the healthiest baby I've ever seen!" Then it was off to the NICU for our little one.

And that is how the hardest, and the most wonderful, year of our lives began. Day two of his life brought the septostomy, which he came through very well. Two weeks later it was the emergency B-T shunt. That time was so hard that it is pretty much a blur, though there are a few memories that are etched into my brain. The first memory is Corey, blue as a Smurf, before the shunt. We'd brought him up from the ER, and they'd left the EKG stickers on him for much too long. When they ripped them off his delicate skin, he got really angry, and his sats dropped into the 40s. I've never seen him so angry, or so blue. The next day, after we'd been up all night trying to keep Corey calm to stop his heart from failing, I remember one of the doctors approaching me to explain what was to happen that day. She caught me at the window, crying, because I was so worn out and so terrified. She was kind enough to take a moment and ask me if this was a bad time to talk, even though every minute mattered. The next moment came after Damian and I walked Corey into the OR and kissed him on the forehead. It felt like goodbye. We walked out of there, in shock, and started down the hall to the waiting room. But we stopped and hugged and just burst into tears before we got there. I think we were both wondering if we'd ever see him again. And the last strong memory from the shunt experience was seeing Corey right as he came out of surgery. They were wheeling him down the hall, the ventilator and the chest tube still in, but his eyes were open and as clear blue as ever. Four days later, we were home again. And Corey slept for 20 minutes at a time during his recovery. No little person should have to handle so much so young.

We were on our toes with Corey while we waited for the next stage surgery. The shunt isn't the most stable physiology, but it was the only option. We made many trips to the doctor, and plenty of trips to the ER during that stage. Finally, at 5 months old, it was time for the Glenn. The week of my brother's wedding, no less! I think we were less frightened for this surgery. Though it's never easy to send your sweet baby into the OR. But this time we knew what to expect, and we pushed to get him out of the hospital as early as possible. Had we been rookies, he probably would have spent another day or two in the hospital. But, hospitals are not restful, and we wanted him home for his recovery. Once he did come home, it took awhile for him to readjust. He cried a lot at night, I think out of fear, and perhaps pain. Eventually he felt better and learned to trust his surroundings again, though.

People mention that the past year has flown by. For us, yes and no. The time before the Glenn felt like the longest time in my life. Then, once he recovered from the Glenn, and things began to return to "normal", time began to pick up speed. And now I too find myself saying, "I can't believe our baby is a year old!" There were moments when I thought this milestone would never come. I thought about how hard it would be if we had to let him go. I still think about that, as we have one more surgery looming before us, though hopefully not for a few more years. I try not to dwell on it, though, and, as all heart parents will tell you, it makes me appreciate milestones like this amazing first birthday for the miracles they are.

Happy Birthday, my little man! We all love you so much!


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